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list thing
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50 Things

1. Your name spelled backwards?
Mada.

2. Last incoming call on your phone?
Eine Freund.

3. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
Free mp3, RIAA be damned.

4. What's your favorite restaurant?
Olive Garden or BJ's Restaurant, where I work.

5. Last time you swam in a pool?
6 months? I had recurrin ear infections when I was a kid, got multiple ear tubes, now water goes directly into my head. If I would swim, I would need ear plugs.

7. How many kids do you want?
Two sarcastic bastards, please.

8. Type of music you dislike most?
Pop country. The hired musicians that play sentimental steel guitar riffs are actually child porn purveyors and puppy abusers. The Nashville Police Department ought to do something.

10. Do you have cable?
Yes, digital cable. Free HBO for a year.

11. Ever have a crush on someone that is at least 10 years older then you?
No. But close.

12. Ever made a prank phone call?
Unsuccessfully.

13. Closest friend?
The wife. Jessi.

14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?
B-jumping.

15. Furthest place you ever traveled?
Southern Germany.

16. Do you have a garden?
This makes me think of ol' Voltaire. Shit yes, and I tend my garden.

17. What's your favorite comic strip?
Hmm. Marmaduke. That crazy Marm! Actually Tom Tomorrow--This Modern World.

18. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem?
Yes. Anyone who says yes should know the proper usage of the word "o'er."

19. Bath or Shower, morning or night?
Both usually. I like my Personal Hygeine and my morning constitutional.

20. Best movie you've seen in the past month?
Can't think of one.

21. Favorite pizza toppings?
Supreme.

22.Chips or Popcorn?
Cigarettes.

24. What did ur last text message in your inbox say?
"Go to hell, fucker!" she said.

26. Orange Juice or apple?
Neither. Coffee and tea good for the liver.

27. Who were the last people you went out to dinner with?
Parents, Old Market, Omaha, Nebraska, at Spaghetti Factory. Not a great server.

28. What did the last text message that u sent say?
Nada.

30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?
1987.

31. Have you ever won a trophy?
Not a figure one.

32. Are you a good cook?
At times.

33. Do you know how to pump gas?
Yes. Pour, douse, light match, view.

35. Sprite or 7-Up ? 
Sprite.

36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school?
No.

37. Last thing you ate? 
Eggs, toast, coffee.

38. Ever thrown up in public place?
Ski lift, 55 feet up, or down, should I say.

39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?
White Stripes say, "It can't be love / For there is no true love."

40. Do you believe in love at first sight?
Love at first bite.

41. Can ex's be just friends?
With sexual tension.

42. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
A dying hermaphrodite with a cleft mouth. I gave him 37 cents and wished him, or her, luck.

44. Who was the last person who you called?
Parents.

46. What was the name of your first pet?
Kitty. All cats should be named Kitty.

47. Who was the second to last person to call you?
Cell phone said, "Unknown." Maybe my bookee.

48. Is there anything going on this weekend?
I must plan my English 102 syllabus.

49. What are you doing tonight?
Vacuuming. Shopping for food. Watching football. Reading the classics of literature.

50. What do you think about most?
The next time I brush my teeth and tweeze unbecoming hairs.
No profanes - sacred
 
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