A takeoff on Grizzly Man, by Werner Herzog, for those of you that have seen it: http://www.travisandjonathan.com/GrizzlyBearMan.html
An attempt at being funny, after my uncle came up with a random writing prompt, asking what I'd dream if my life was in perfect order:
Robert, and dignified Schenck Clan,
When I read this last night, I couldn't think of what to write. The creative reserves were sapped. I procrastinated. This is my magic formula.
Thus I slept soundly last night, perhaps seeking a relevant dream for the telling. And I slept, and I slept, and my alarm clocked failed me, like rearguard generals who fail their soldiers in the line of fire. Thus instead of
waking up at 6 a.m. for my first 8 a.m. English 102 class which is my charge to teach, I slouched to a glorious 7:28 a.m. rising, leaving just enough minutes to present myself professionally to my new students, and conduct a fun-filled first day of class, replete with the name game, boring syllabus talk, a
discussion on "Who owns the truth?" and a writing exercise to finish this sentence: "I don't want to get off on a rant here, but..."
Such winsome delights that are mine! This morning was made possible by nothing other than a polka tune with genius lyrics (now forgotten) performed by me in what seemed to be the great vacuum of Space.
Now I tell you, Schencks, I have dreamt that dream, and it was, as Robert puts it, "the most wonderful dream it is possible to dream!" The polka tune dream that allowed me to get to class on time.
And I told my students: "My last name is Schenck, and it's pronounced SKANK. There's more of us than you think; people with the name, that is."